Autocorrect is a Menace

Let me say it again: Autocorrect is a Menace!

Seriously. (Did you mean sensuously?)

That is not news. Autocorrect (Did you mean Alan Alda?) is a bane on humanity! A cursory Google search (Did you mean gluegun siren?) will verify that nearly EVERYONE is frustrated (Did you mean Frozen Songs?) by this technological (Did you mean Templar?) invention. Usually, it’s just annoying and you shake it off (Did you mean Taylor Swift?) and move on, but sometimes it strikes fear into your very heart (Did you mean blueberry tart?) and freezes it with terror (Did you mean Frozen Songs?)

For instance, last night my kids were looking for cute animal pictures on Pinterest (Did you mean colossal time-suck?). My wife and I do monitor their computer time (Did you mean new-fangled babysitter?), but we all know that sometimes things happen (Did you mean Maroon 5 is inexplicably one of the hottest bands in the world?). We were all sitting on the bed together (Did you mean weirdos?), reading, surfing, etc… and our son decided to look for pictures of Big Bunnies (Did you mean Big But…), uh that’s enough!

Yes, indeed. His search autocorrected to something that Sir Mix-A-Lot could not lie about and would greatly appreciate (Did you mean Old School Rap is the Bomb?). Outrageous, I say! It’s fine when search engines provide options for topics, it’s helpful even, but when autocorrect just finishes the job and puts a hot round of inappropriate right in the chamber, well it’s time to take a stand (Did you mean stripper?)

No. (Stryper?)

No. (Strangler?)

Ugh! (Stranger?)

Shut up! (Apricot Chutney?)

Forget it! (Did you mean an expletive that refers to an act of self-love or Frozen Songs?)

Garrragggggggghhhhhh! (Did you mean you want me to stop?)

Yes. (Did you mean Yeti?)

sigh…..

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